My Soul Cries Out!

This is an email response that I sent to a dear sister and fellow classmate who reached out to me after learning about the Grand Jury's decision not to indict Eric Garner's murderer. This came straight from the heart, so I thought I'd share with you all the emotions that many of my brothers and sisters are feeling at the moment. In all the cacophony of fellow Christians screaming, "facts!" There are people, like myself, who are image-bearers of the True and Living God, and we are hurting. Hear my heart and please disregard any grammatical errors. 

I am speechless, sister! Thank you for taking the time to email me and mourn with me. Honestly, that is all we ask from our brothers and sisters in Christ.

It has been so very difficult for me to be at WTS as of late. Especially this semester, as I am the ONLY African-American woman in the MDiv program. It is difficult to sit back and see everyone carry on with life as usual while my life is spinning out of control and has been turned upside down with each subsequent miscarriage of justice. It hurts, so I weep andI tweet. I tweet out my rage because it is too hard to face the raw emotions. I try to focus on school, but I just can't.

Just as I was finally turning the corner on the Mike Brown situation, it happens again, this time Eric Garner. I wonder who will be next? Will it be my cousins or nephews? What will their future look like? What does my future hold? While I was praying this morning, I can honestly say that for the first time, I feel fear about living in America. My own country has put me into a state of fear. That is an indignity no human being should have to undergo.

With each death of my unarmed brothers, I feel a palpable loss. I have shed too many tears, and I am tired of grieving for my brother and sisters. What is a black life worth? Can we live like everybody else? These are the questions at the root of these atrocities. Sadly, America has answered us with a resounding "nothing" to the former, and "no!" to the latter. These injustices threaten to eat away at my very soul. I am weary and I need your prayers. Thank you for your empathy and care, it is a balm to my soul.

Grace to you,

Ekemini Uwan